A Numbers Game

I think my maths (or math as my adopted kinfolk say) is improving. That's a bold (hehe) claim for me.

My maths is unbelievably unofficially crap {Officially it's excellent as i) I triple check anything that involves numbers and my brain in the same equation and ii) according to my GCSE A* certificate and my (of course impeccable) CV which no-one ever disputes thank god. This is a very good thing particularly considering as most of my jobs involve massaging numbers in spreadsheets to reassure 'le boss de jour' that I've played my part in a) making them a squillion million or b) saved/ found them a bagillion squillion million so they can't fire me just yet. Honestly squillion bagillions are real numbers to me - see - what can possibly go wrong!?} I have a GCSE A* in Maths. I am not a Magician. Until now.

Everyday Crossfit requires that I:

• time my workout


• count my reps (this can be anything from 1-300 - typically I get bored and lose focus around number 5)


• count sets (this can be anything from 1-300 ;-))) typically I get bored and lose focus around number 2)


• recall 500m row times, 400m run times and match/improve on these - wtfoozy?!


• count where I came in the order of things - last always last - except - here mwahaha 


• recall what weight I can/cannot lift


• how many pounds are in a kilo and vica versa (critical for the point above)


• how many sexy legs and 6 packs I've spotted (ok ok not a requirement - that's just a personal perk)

Never mind keep a tally of :

• my snacks for the day (today just 1!!!!!!!!)


• meals eaten (today is a two meal day - breakfast (scrambled eggs) at 10am, lunch (cob salad) at 4pm, and it's now 9pm and I need to go to bedfordshire -see below)


• hours of sleep (5am wake up & 10km run tomorrow = LOTS of sleep required)


• steps taken (today just to the fridge from my desk twice = 16 steps and once to the bathroom and back = 26 steps!)


• kilometers run


• seconds I can hold my weight up on the bar/ rings - seriously, wtfoozy?!


• PBs of double unders in a row (16), pull ups (7), burpees (50), inverted push ups (ZERO) etc etc


• days til 1/2 marathon race death - 25 :-((


• pounds I think I've lost/ gained on my imaginary scales


• callouses I've peeled off my hands - today, 3, if you must know

Plus throw in:

• the ability to recall my US contact details. You just never know, one day I might need to give out my real number not just one I make up - well if you'll put me on the spot ;-))


• translating US dollars to UK currency (secretly: I don't bother, to me $1: £1 = easy peasy! although everything here is so inexplicably expensive ;-) According to my system I spent £19 on a bottle of shampoo today - see: crazy expensive.


• keeping a running mental tally of how many dollars I have left, divided by the number of days until my pride goes broke and I can beg my father for a loan ;-))


• psychically knowing how many gallons of petrol my car requires in it's tank etc etc (It's all prepay here - I am not a mechanic or a magician. CRAZY!!!!!!!) 


• the days: hours: seconds: milliseconds til I return home and relinquish FREEEEEEEEDOM for the office.


• AND most importantly the number of presents I need to purchase before I get on the plane home!!

But one of my increasingly favourite numbers is 57 - this isn't:

• my weight, in kilos - I WISH!


• max age of a potential mail order husband - let's not go there.....................YET


• number of brackets used in this post 


• number of presents my lil sister thinks she deserves


• OR spoonfuls of Justin's chocolate almond butter I've eaten this afternoon trying to make the maths work, in an IT system that clearly never got a A* Maths GCSE!, for my current soon-to-be million-squillionaire boss ;-)

It's.......... (submit your answers on a postcard) xx